Thoughts on Leaving

As I begin my farewells again I cannot shake these questions:

• Do I long for God as much as I long for the people I painfully miss?
• Do I believe He loves me as much as I know they do?

Which leads me to a prayer I read a few years ago. I'm not sure who wrote it...

"O God, I have tasted Thy goodness and it has both satisfied me and made me thirsty for more. I am painfully conscious of my need of further grace. I am ahsamed of my lack of desire. O God, the Triune God, I want to want Thee; I long to be filled with longing; I thirst to be made more thirsty still. Show me Thy glory, I pray Thee, that so I may know Thee indeed. Begin in mercy a new work of love within me. Say to my soul, 'Rise up, my love, my fair one, and come away." Then give me grace to rise and follow Thee up from this misty lowland where I have wandered so long. In Jesus' Name, Amen."

My new departure date is May 6th and I'll reach Jamaican shores in the afternoon on the 7th.

Please look under Prayer Requests for new prayer points.

Thank you so much for all your amazing support and encouragement. You are a blessing to me.

Hello again, I'm still alive!

Amidst the reoccuring nausea that visits me as I approach departure time I have been thinking about some things...

1. It may be wise for me to stay in Canada a few days longer to spend time with family and get a little more organized since I spent my first 2 weeks here crashing and recovering. I decided I'll make a decision about that this Wednesday.

2.Man, I've got is so good: loving family, incredibly supportive church, amazing friends, the best place in the world to come home to and jungle adventures ahead. I am so astronomically blessed to have opportunities to see God's beauty in all these different people and places. He is beautiful and it's good to feel like my eyes are open again.

3. This last one takes a little longer to explain. Last week I went to Mt. Baker with my fabulous friend and snow-boarding instructor extraordinaire, Alissa. As we swished (and I tumbled) down the snowy slopes I couldn't help but realize how learning to snowboard is very much like falling in love. Read on, if you will.

Learning to snowboard is like falling in love because...

-It's terrifying and so much fun at the same time.

-You're bound to get hurt, but if you don't get up and try again, you'll always wonder, what if my next run would've been my best?

-I get kinda nervous when I start going too fast because I remember what it's like to crash.

-Even though you go home a little bruised and tender, you know you'll come back because you remember the moments when you just didn't want it to end.

The chairlift, however, is like a blind-date; you're never quite sure how it's going to work out. It could start out wobbly (fall over before even getting on the chair) and end real smooth with an "Oh yeah" smile on your face. Or it could begin without a hitch and end in an awkward faceplant.


Stay tuned for decisions and thoughts on leaving!

Em